…Not too long ago, while spending time alone writing (what else), I was momentarily brought back to not so distance past. As I was carrying out research on differing cultures. I came across a number of individuals who, unlike a certain societies today, are more concerned about their past lives than the ones they are currently living in. Sometimes not by choice but these people are convinced how the past can influence their future. That is not uncommon of course. However, I became entangled in a mini crisis with several subjects (that’s a another story) which in some respect, compelled me to note down these observations. Is Time really capable of healing the past…
To actually state, Time heals everything, when one gets hurt in the past, really is quite bizarre. For me, to be healed by Time, per se, seemed reprehensible . Firstly because there is basically nothing to heal and Time, is not really the healer of the forgettable past. What Time does is it literally flies by, stimulating a belief that all unpleasant experiences which ends all hopes of achieving any dreams, falsely continue to exist. At most, it may just be a proverb or a figure of speech but I will argue reluctantly, that it’s a poor one (smiles). Time is simply capable of multiplying naivetés. When something happened in the past, regardless whether it upsets us or makes us feel like a winner, people say that, in Time, those things will blow over (another proverb perhaps). And in Time, something that happened today will be considered history by tomorrow. Now that is perhaps what Time really does to us, especially to our past. But certainly, Time doesn’t heal anything… tick tock tick tock tick tock…
Let’s take for example, a relationship break-up: These things happen for a variety of reasons. No matter what the circumstances are, we know that it is a very, very difficult thing to accept. The feelings may not be instantaneous but nonetheless there will be some degree of regrets. Whoever shoulders the blame for the breakdown of the relationship will probably suffer more than the other. While sympathy will come pouring in, more often than not people would typically say, “Time will cure all things”. What a total bull…! It’s like the dark ages where society seems to create the perfect solace for a terrible past. In my honest opinion, people need to snap out of it! And move on! There are many ways to deal with everyday inadequacies but telling ourselves that Time will heal, really is quite ridiculous. And telling people that Time will heal can be perilous. Some people can’t take advice like that.
“Life is like photography.
You need the negatives to develop.”
What we should be telling these people is, try thinking about the wonderful things that happened during that relationship. Breaking up can be hard to cope with thus it’s great when love relationships blossom. Every glowing smile and every tender touch, every sweet kiss and silly ‘welfies’… no matter who they are, they will believe that it’s Heavens’ gift. Profoundly blessed to be granted with a perfect companion their souls could ever have. Before things slowly came to an abrupt end, that beautiful moment, is perhaps the best thing that has ever happen in their lives. Before any decision was made to terminate a relationship, those lovely instances, where nothing else matters in life, are probably the ones that they live their life for. So why would anyone needs Time to heal for? Revisiting a dreadful past can sometimes bring back unbearable pain. The doors of insanity open up at every stoppage in the passage of learning. Ironically we need the past to tell us how innocent we were at the time. Because Time is a constant lesson.
And what about those beautiful past that we had before? The wonderful moments we leave behind. The glorious period of our lifetime… Is Time responsible for its demise? Certainly, the “figure of speech” doesn’t quite apply here. It may have mutually end but why can’t good times last? Meanwhile those great moments were unfairly invalidated and vanished from our lives. In some disappointing cases, to repeat those successful chapter of our lives is next to impossible. No matter how much or how long we try, some things are too difficult to emulate. Time has come to a full circle. But does that mean Time will heal our flaws? Unfortunately Time is the culprit for this abstruse outcome because all good things must come to an end. Time doesn’t really heal. Time simply shows us that we are really not perfect. But it cannot be left to rule us. It may just be destined to be over and done with..
“Time is an unpaid advocate.” — Now that’s what I call a perfect cliché..! Time has no emotion and Time can really ruin your plans and probably ruin us for good measure. People should realise that those happiness or sorrow that we experience in the past are actually part of our journey. It happened because it was meant to happen… Call it fate. I strongly recommend that we go with the flow. If you need to cry over the past.., Stop! Try reminiscing instead. The result is, just grand…! Take my word for it. Relish what actually occurred during those glorious moments. If the need to make false optimism comes up, so be it..! What the heck…? Go back to the past and be gratified. Think of all those lost opportunities as… (Hmm, let me see….) “Shit happens”. If you ever feel sorry for yourself after you come back to the real world, do it over again. It can be therapeutic.
“We learn something from everyone who
passes through our lives..
Some lessons are painful, some are painless..
but, all are priceless.”
“…Time need not heal my thoughts. I am not in despair. The past shall remained there for me to reach out. Time shall never hold my sanctity for ransom nor my affection for auction. I shall live life the way I desire to live life. Only I decide when my destiny shall last. And you are where my destiny lies. I cherished every sweet moment we shared. Nothing can compare to those magnificent feats of our lives. The extraordinary part of this life with you deep inside it shall remain in this immortal memory. Time will pass us by but whenever I yearn for the sensual moments, I would only need to return to the portraits of your love to me. You are forever etched in my Time of life…
Love you to bits, baby… Love you to bits.”
— ..excerpts from Letters to Bani.